When you think you’re in the wrong job: 15 questions to ask yourself
We are still seeing people leave their jobs for others jobs, start-ups, consulting businesses, side hustles, and self-exploration. Sometimes we leave for more money and more opportunity, but more often than not, it is just for a change. Sometimes we need a change from the monotony that has become our job. Sometimes we can’t sustain the pace of the breakneck speed we are operating. Sometimes it is because we have outgrown our job — we have mastered it. Sometimes we are out of alignment with our present situation or the organization's direction.
It is easy to come up with reasons to leave a job. Identifying all the wrong things, out of sorts and need to be fixed is pretty straightforward. It is harder to come up with reasons to stay. It is much harder to sit, reflect, and consider what is good in what we have in our careers. Even though more complicated, we need to force ourselves to do this. We owe it to ourselves to not just identify the negative but also spend time finding the positive.
The old saying: “When the going gets tough, the tough get going” rings true, but I have been thinking lately about what does this mean: “the tough get going”? If something is “tough,” does that mean I should get going, or should I hunker down and figure out how to make something less tough?
When we talked about resilience two years ago, I focused solely on staying tough against external circumstances out of our control, i.e., the pandemic. I didn’t focus on the other side of resilience: sticking with something and making it better. Is resilience only about surviving the storm, or shouldn’t it also mean controlling what we can control and making it more tolerable while in the storm? We shouldn’t just focus on surviving, but why not focus on thriving.
The challenge is when does it make sense to be resilient, and when do we give up, in a sense, and make a change? Sometimes, this is a difficult question, but before we decide to change, we need to explore both sides — the challenges and the good things.
Here is my list of questions to ask yourself. If you want more in-depth information on your career, check out my new book on Amazon, Succeed from the Middle, and read Chapter 4: Career Development and You.
Are you doing things you can’t stand? If so, how often are you doing these things?
No job is perfect. We all do things we don’t like as part of our jobs. The key is how often you work on things or do tasks you don’t like.
Do you know how to change things?
If things are wrong and you don’t know how to improve them, this can be very frustrating. Consider doing research, asking for advice, or just trying something out to see what happens. Clarity will come from action, so don’t overthink it.
Do you have support to change things?
If you know how to change things, do you have support from your manager or leaders to make changes? If not, have you tried to influence this? Or have you just assumed there would be no support? Yeah…I have done that, as much as I hate to admit it. If you haven’t tried to propose changes, you owe yourself to try.
Are you learning?
If your job is challenging, are you at least learning something new? Are you adding skills and knowledge to your arsenal for a future position? This may be worth staying for.
Are you helping?
Are you helping others? Sometimes we don’t feel successful or happy in our jobs, but we are helping others in theirs. Consider this point carefully. Are there ways to help that you are not doing right now because you are focused on your challenges? This is a question I try to ask myself often. It is easy to get stuck in our heads and situations.
Does this job get you to a new level?
Even if the job is not ideal, is it a solid stepping stone to the next level for you? Will the experience you are gaining position you to take on new challenges and opportunities? Is it worth sticking with it for a time?
Are you underpaid? If so, can you have a conversation with facts about why you need a raise?
There is no better time to ask for a raise. But, here is the thing about that. Do your research and come up with your accomplishments. Make a case for a raise; don’t just grouse that you are underpaid. Prove it. It may not be hard to prove, but to get to a “yes,” you need to be armed with facts about you, the market, the role, and your potential and commitment to the organization.
If you need help, have you asked for help?
Many of us take things on all by ourselves. I am fiercely independent…maybe too much so. What happens with this independence is that I rarely ask for help. Consider asking your manager to help you make a case for more resources, more pay, more challenging work…whatever you are craving.
Have you sought out a mentor? Have you sought out advice or feedback?
Part of asking for help may mean finding a mentor to provide advice and feedback about your present situation and career. If you are close to making a change, talk it through with someone, and not just your spouse. :-)
Do you have what you need to do your job well? Are you set up for success? If not, can you have an open and honest conversation about that?
Have you thought about your goals, systems, processes, and structure around you? Are you set up for success? If not, you might want to consider asking for support. Managers don’t always have all the answers. Consider coming with some thoughts about how they can help you. You might be surprised.
Do you like the organization?
How much have you thought about that organization itself? Do you generally like the people and environment? How do you feel about the culture? If the culture needs to shift, can you help initiate that shift?
Are you aligned in values?
Are you aligned with the organization’s and leaders’ values? Do you know what they are? If not, can you propose to be more thoughtful to create values? Can you survey employees to see what they consider essential values?
Do you care about the mission? Do you see yourself in the mission and know how you can further it?
How do you feel about the organization’s mission? Are you aligned? Do you care? Does it mean something to you? Furthermore, do you see how you impact that mission? Seeing impact and feeling like you belong to something more significant is fundamental to us. Explore this facet and consider the job you were hired to do.
What is missing from what you do today? Can this be creatively found in your organization?
Spend time thinking about what is wrong or missing — this is the negative. Then, challenge yourself to think about how it could be changed or turned around in your organization. What would that take? Is this feasible?
If you can’t turn this around, do you know you can find this in a different opportunity?
I am ending with my absolute favorite question. Another way to say this is: Do you know the grass will be greener? Do you know you will find what you lack in a new opportunity? If you don’t know and decide to interview, ask very specific questions to ensure you are not jumping just for money or just for a change. I have made this mistake in my life a couple of times. Each time I learned the same lesson with a few more insights, which led me to create the list above.
You may need to make a change. Sometimes taking a risk pays off. As someone who is risk-averse, I tend not to take big risks, but I encourage a little analysis and say go for fit if it is right. Only you know how to answer the questions above. If the answers are not clear, seek clarity. If the answers are clear and you can make some changes, try it. If the answers are clear and you find yourself more deflated, perhaps it is time to explore other options.
Let me know how it goes. I will be rooting for you.