When you want to be thankful: 7 quick tips for expressing gratitude at work
Thanksgiving is usually a time for reflection, gathering, and thinking about how fortunate we are in that moment. Some of us may not feel grateful this year; there may be valid reasons if we experienced loss, grief, intolerance, or unfairness.
I think it can be difficult to see outside of ourselves and identify what we are thankful for and what we take for granted. We all probably did this little exercise over the holidays — go around the dinner table and ask people what they are thankful for. I would guess most of us mentioned the person sitting next to or across from us. Or, if we didn’t, we may have heard about it later.
Many of us gave thanks for our health, strength, faith, homes, families, or maybe the dog, who gives us unconditional love and a furry coat we pet when we are stressed. How many of us gave thanks for our job? I am sure some of us have our hands raised but I would allege most of us don’t.
So, why not? Many of us are employed with a good job, great teams, and challenging work. Perhaps some of us want more — more money, more flexibility, more autonomy, more scope, or more authority. Maybe some of us want less — fewer hours, less responsibility, less stress, or fewer politics. Whether you want more or less, it is easy to become disheartened in our jobs today.
There are a lot of interesting opportunities out there. I have seen an explosion of start-ups with amazing ideas, generous funding, and awesome chances to make a real go of it. I am seeing corporations investing in learning, growth, and diversity in real ways, which is very exciting. Talented people always have options and there are so many options out there. These options may or may not be right for us. If you are deciding on a new job, read my post about that topic here.
We can take our jobs for granted and get into slumps. It is very easy to see what we don’t have and it is easy to miss what we do. We have had a tough 21 months so far. Just when we think we may get back to normal, we realize that “normal” is this yo-yo feeling of two steps forward and one step back. This is it. This is the present. We can’t change it.
In these times, it is easy to feel deflated, defeated, and depressed. How do we pull ourselves out of this? What do we take for granted? What should we truly be thankful for? How can we express gratitude at work?
Take a pause.
I find at this time of year, regardless of our circumstances, we should take a pause. I see many people ramping things up to get things done by end of year. I think instead this is a time to reflect on what we have done this past year and take time out to breathe. It is difficult to see all the good things if we are constantly on a path of busyness. Being busy can do us a disservice as it can take our time and attention away from what matters. Take a pause and identify what matters; that effort will lead you to identify what to be thankful for.
Recognize others.
Doesn’t it feel good to recognize others? I promise you will never feel down or bad if you reach out and recognize someone else for a good job, a great presentation, a nice story…whatever they have done. And, the smaller, the better. Gratitude lies in the little stuff. Reach out to someone this week and recognize them for something small they did that made a difference to you, your team, company, or community. You will feel good and they will feel thankful.
Thank your boss.
Bosses are people too and they have had a rough go of it. Many of us may complain or bring only our challenges to our bosses. They are there to listen, ask questions, guide and help. But, think about that. How much does your boss juggle? How much have they managed this year? Follow the first tip and take a pause. Truly think about what your boss has been through and how much they take on in a week. Walk in their shoes for just a second. We can be struggling but so can our boss. Reflect and thank them for something this week. As a manager myself, I always appreciate when someone offers thanks for something I did for them or the team.
Appreciate yourself.
Don’t skip yourself. Hopefully, someone else is showing you thanks or appreciation. Whether that is happening or not, think about what you have achieved, how you have helped others, and feel good about yourself. Reward yourself somehow — take a random day off not tied to the holidays, go to the spa, buy or borrow a new book, indulge in the latest Netflix true-crime series, or just do nothing and relish in it. We shouldn’t rely on others to make us feel good and be thankful. We can be thankful for ourselves and how we have remained strong during these times.
Make a list.
I used to make gratitude lists, which is a highly recommended task to find our mojo and move our mindsets into a positive, proactive, and productive state. Most counselors will give this advice to get us out of our heads. Take pen to paper or fingers to phone screen and list what we are grateful for every day for 30 days. It is very difficult to be down or defeated when you make a deliberate effort to record good things. Things on my list have included: birds singing, sunshine, rain, people laughing, my Grandma’s Spritz cookie recipe, and the book I am reading. When we take a pause and think about it, there is so much to be grateful for that are small things.
Resist cynicism.
This one is hard and can be hard for me from time to time. It is easy to get caught up in politics, processes, and personalities. It is easy to be cynical about why things are the way they are or why things aren’t going my way. It is easy to lash out or avoid people and situations altogether. We can roll our eyes and shrug our shoulders. Try to catch yourself if you start down the cynical path; this will only lead to taking something for granted and not being positive and productive. Cynicism is not realism; these are two different approaches. Being a realist can help you anticipate obstacles and plan for success. Being cynical is a short walk to negative, closed-minded thinking. Just be aware of it. Perhaps you can identify it if you follow number one and take a pause occasionally.
Focus on the good.
Once you have your list and start showing appreciation for your team, your boss, and you, it is almost impossible to not focus on the good things. The bad things will still be there; they won’t go away but they can become background noise instead of the main attraction dominating your thoughts. Consciously focus on the good for one week and see what happens to your mindset, mood, and even energy level.
If you are full of gratitude now, share with others how you got here and how you maintain your outlook. If you are struggling, find one thing to be grateful for and write it down every day. You will be amazed how your mindset shifts. We all have a lot to be thankful for even if we faced adversity this year. The fact that we faced it and came through it is something to celebrate.
I love the quote from writer and psychologist, Richard Carlson. He said in his book’s title: “Don’t sweat the small stuff, and it’s all small stuff.” Small stuff can be stressful or things to be grateful for; it is your choice. Choose thankfulness and start that ripple of gratitude throughout your workplace.