When your team member wants a new job: 7 actions to take
If you manage people, you have been there. A valued team member comes to you and says they want more in their job — more responsibility, more people, a higher level or they want an entirely different job. They may even have one in mind they want to apply for or have already applied for!
Early in my career, I knew I wanted more and I saw an opportunity to pitch a new job the company never had before so I found a sponsor for myself in the company and went for it. What I didn’t do was tell my current boss about it. Why did I do that? Because I thought she would block me. I thought she would not only block me but maybe take my idea and pitch it for herself.
Was this rational thinking? Maybe not. But, clearly, I was concerned that I could not be candid with my manager and I thought she would not help me but hinder me.
Some organizations have policies in place that you cannot apply for another job internally without informing your current manager. This certainly helps with transparent communication but can put the employee and manager in an awkward spot if they haven’t had transparent career conversations to date.
But, should this really be awkward? Why is this news a surprise to some managers? In my case, my manager was incredibly surprised. She had no idea I wanted more or was looking at other opportunities even though I had expressed my desires. In fact, my skip level manager wondered why my manager was so surprised.
At the time, I thought how weird. Why did the skip level manager think this? Of course, my manager was upset. But, now that I am more experienced, I completely get it. The skip level manager felt that if my manager had had career conversations with me and was more in tune with my desires, she would have helped me find something. Instead, I struck out on my own.
I think it is wonderful if a manager feels strongly that their team is somehow loyal to them. However, I have a caution. Even though you think everyone is satisfied, a manager should never be surprised when someone comes to them saying they want something more or different. In fact, I would say this year and next, we are going to see (and are already seeing) a great job swap. People are coming out of “sheltering in job” and looking for something else, something more challenging, something more fulfilling, something more joy-inspiring.
We will talk next week about how to have these career conversations before you get the news but what do you do when someone comes to you with desires or even a real possibility of moving out of your team? Here are seven actions to consider taking.
Ask yourself why are you surprised?
If your team member says they have or want to apply for another job and you are surprised, this is the perfect time for some reflection on your part. If your team member has left you in the dark, there may be a reason. Reflect and ask yourself why they were not comfortable. Did they think you would not be supportive? What could you have done to be a cheerleader and coach instead of an obstacle? Even if you would have never been an obstacle, clearly, your team member felt differently. If nothing else, ask yourself if you ever had a discreet career conversation. Did you ever ask the question about their future desires or present issues they may be facing? People pursue other jobs to go for something but also to get away from something. Determine which circumstance this is here.
Ask your team member questions.
When your team member does decide to leave, it is okay to ask a few questions to help you going forward. Don’t make this an interrogation, however. Ask questions that will help you in your management style going forward. It is okay to ask what was missing from their current role. What is in the new path they are wanting to explore? What values or other motives are driving this? Is there anything they would have liked you to do differently for them? If you position these questions as collecting feedback, most people will engage and help you sort out what to change for the future.
Have a different mindset.
Many managers struggle with the concept that their team members are really part of the larger organization and not just your team member. As a manager, your role is help your team be productive, perform well and also succeed, which can include pursuing other positions. Managers need to recognize people don’t want to stay stuck. They want growth, development and movement in their careers. As a manager, you should help them for the good of the organization and the good of your team members. Some managers hoard talent and actually block them from other opportunities. This mindset is the quickest way to lose a good employee and see them on their way out the door. I often ask managers what is worse — losing your team member to another department or losing them to another company. Actually, it should not even be viewed as “losing someone.” This is the whole point of being a manager who supports the career growth of their team. Sometimes that growth means to move into something else.
Support them.
If someone comes to you, support their choice. Certainly seek to understand why they want to move but don’t be defensive. In my case above, my manager was very defensive. She challenged me as to why I never told her anything about the new job I was pitching. I felt like I was called into the Principal’s office. It was highly combative and highly uncomfortable. Don’t choose this path. Defensiveness will leave them with a bad taste and could trickle over to other team members about how horribly you handled the situation. Instead, seek to understand how you can support them in their move.
Offer to mentor them in the future.
In the theme of supporting their choice, offer to stay connected and even be a mentor to them when they need one. First managers or past managers make excellent mentors. You know the person very well by working with them for years. If you have a strong a relationship, this is half of what makes a good mentoring relationship. Chemistry is important in a solid mentoring relationship. This is also your chance to flex your listening and guiding skills should they need you in their future career decisions.
Use this as an opportunity to examine your management style.
First, when a team member wants to leave, it may not be your fault or something regrettable. I should make this point clear. People have unique values, interests, and circumstances in their lives. Seeking a new position may have nothing to do with you. So, don’t feel badly about this. However, it is always good to reflect on where you could have been more in tune or more supportive. There may not have been anything else you could have done. But, there could be other items you might be able to change or work on to be a more proactive and supportive manager. These times are good times to think about that.
Use this as an opportunity to review team structure.
When someone wants to leave, it sometimes opens up chances to think about the team as whole. It might inspire you to ask others what they are thinking, wanting, etc. It might give you a chance to give others more responsibility, expand the scope, or even re-organize a little to be more efficient. Someone leaving doesn’t mean you have to do this but it is a good time to think not only about your style but also the make-up and processes on your team.
Receiving the news that someone wants a different role is not necessarily bad. Growth and mobility is a good thing. To retain good people, you need to provide career opportunities and, sometimes, those opportunities are off your team. As a manager, you should help support these changes proactively and not be surprised with this type of news. Help your team members figure out what they want to do, help them learn the skills and knowledge to do them and find opportunities to apply them — on your team or another team.